Butler
Chief Engineer Daniels
Amir
Mike
Sheriff Bates
Robber
Judge Parker
Diner Owner
Goat Farmer
The Bartender
Griswald
Danvers
Millard 'Duck' Davis
Captain Smalls
Charity Santa
Prof. Wells (as Mike Gaglio)
Benny
Dr. Steven
Mark
Bar Patron
Hartford
Jim
Mr. Richards
Tony
Grismer
Johnson
Checkers Man (as Mike Gaglio)
Bartender
T-Bird Owner
Steve
Sidewalk Santa
Mr. Turnbull
Bill
Carmichael
Otis
Bartender
Dr. Mortimer (as Mike Gaglio)
Phinnias
Santa
Jones
Detective Rogers
Herbert
Hoke (as Mike Gaglio)
Professor Roger Franklin
Grabowski
Mike
Talbot (as Mike Gaglio)
Inspector Hinds
John in Bar
Danvers (archive footage)
Bartender
Custodian 1
Balthasar
SGT Ben Peterson
General Randall
Drunkard (as Mike Gaglio)
Bar Patron
Bartender
Clancey
Bartender
David
Bill Buxley
Louie
Grabowski (archive footage)
Captain Dern
Mike (archive footage)
Adam
Deputy Miller
First Producer
The Villager